Going to the sleep doctor today for a follow-up consultation about my sleep apnea mask. Although I love the device–sleeping MUCH better, and having dreams that are better than the movies, except that I miss the buttered popcorn–I have two things to complain about:

  1. Wind. I say “wind” rather than “gas” because the problem is air going into my stomach as well as my lungs. Yes, I realize that this is TMI, but a mommy learns that, in order to be truly useful to her children, she has to say unladylike things sometimes. And I am MomGoth, after all.
  2. Sounds like wind. At the other end of the, er, spectrum, there’s a problem with tightness adjustment on the mask. Too tight, and it gives me a headache and makes my nose and cheekbone (the one that got walloped when I fell in that parking lot) sore. Too loose, and air leaks out around the edges. Sometimes it just blows air into my eyeball, and sometimes it hisses or makes that cartoon noise you get when you let air out of a balloon slowly. You know the one. Sounds like a whoopee cushion. Talk about unladylike!

But those are small things, really, considering how much better I feel, using it.

Another good thing: Our #1 daughter turned us on to this stuff called Fantastic World Foods Taco Filling, Quick Vegetarian Mix. You mix it up and use it like ground beef seasoned for tacos. I used it in a casserole and it was delicious! Last night, I used it on an Italian bread pizza and it was even better. Next try will be chili, or maybe chili mac.

Naturally, these dishes can be made with actual meat, seasoned for tacos or chili.

ITALIAN BREAD PIZZA

  • Italian bread with cheese on top (from deli)
  • Vegetarian taco filling
  • sliced olives
  • “Cajun” mirepoix (celery, green peppers, onions)
  • spaghetti sauce
  • Italian cheese blend
  • Anything else you like on pizza

Cut whatever length of bread you want and slice it in half. Toast the top under the broiler. Top with sauce, toppings, then cheese. Bake at 350F until the cheese melts.

CHILI MAC

  • cooked macaroni
  • Vegetarian taco filling
  • fresh or canned diced tomatoes or tomato sauce

Mix and heat. Add beans and/or cheese, if you like.

Well, that’s enough of that.

MA

writing prompt: Give a character gas and send him/her out in public. Go on–it’ll be fun!