I Ditch My Moustache

Any of you who have been through The Change know that you get to stop growing hair on your legs and start growing hair on your face. Fun. Joy. A million laughs.

Plucking works on the chin hair, although that’s getting to be a bigger production as the years go by. The upper lip, though…. Well, let’s be blunt–MY upper lip…. I won’t say it’s a walrus moustache, but I haven’t had to buy fish for ten years.

I tried bleaching it, but my dear mother looked at me and said, “Oh, you have such a cute blonde moustache! You look like Martin Mull!”

So I tried plucking, which gave me the choice of going through the day with my lip red and swollen. I tried to pass myself off as Angelina Jolie, but it didn’t work. I tried shaving, but that was just weird.

Yesterday, Mom and I were at the beauty shop, having our hairs cut, and I saw the woman next to me having her lip ripped off and I said, “Do that to me, too!”

So Hope painted my upper lip (and, it seemed, half my face) with hot wax, pressed paper on it, and RIPPED! It hurt. Yes, it did. But only for a second. She showed me what she had removed, and I was like, Dear God, it looks like a cat! I could sew that paper to a coat and the PETA people would throw paint on me.

Anyway, I am now moustache-free. I also brought Mom to work at The Book Box this morning, and forgot to bring the money box for her to make change from. So I guess we know where my brains were.

MA

Writing prompt: What does your main character dislike most about his/her appearance? Do other people remark on it? Would he/she do anything to change it? If so, what?